MAC

It was a typical Monday night at Barrage with Patti. The bartender, MAC, sketch us without our knowledge. We were pleasantly surprised by the gesture and his skills!










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Location:47th Street, New York, New York, United States

All my life I've been good, but now...

I'm thinking, WHAT THE HELL!

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#snowprahwinfrey: There's Got To Be A Morning After

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Location:W 40th St,New York,United States

Snowpocalypse!

Today

You are unstoppable! You can be slowed. You may be detoured. You may even make pit stops along the way. But you will get there!!

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FaceBook Status Update: Hiatus

I have had a love hate relationship with Facebook for well over year. While I am not
loathing it at the moment, I have been systematically removing content and privatizing my profile for quite sometime now. Today, I've deactivated my account. I wanna focus my efforts on my blog, and maybe give podcasting a try. Most importantly, I wanna make a conscious effort to actually spend time with friends, as opposed to sharing moments via wall comments and status updates. I'll be taking some time off from work soon and my hopes are to reconnect with some dearly missed friends.

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Location:Park Ave,Weehawken,United States

6:28a

גם זה יעבור

Stop Breaking Your Own Heart: The Art of Self Sabotage

Recently I was reminded once again that sometimes I can not fix everything. Sometimes it is best to let go and step away from yet another inevitable emotional collision.


Two years ago, I ended a relationship which in retrospect began just as inexplicably as it ended. During the final days I recall the particular conversation which led to my decision to end the relationship. "I self-sabotage relationships," he said to me. The next day, I packed up his belongings and advised that perhaps it would be best if we parted ways. From the moment he walked out the door, I blamed myself. Not so much because of the choice I had made, but for the realization that I had perpetuated and subjected myself to a false relationship for months before I decided to end it.


It took me a good year before I had felt healed. It was around that 'year after' mark that I realized I needed to stop breaking my own heart over matters that are beyond my control. I also realized that the act of control should never enter into the realm of a relationship, despite predominant the notion that relationships are essentially battles for supremacy.


Sometimes people involve themselves with partners who may not necessarily compliment them. We fall into this false notion that we have found our other. There is courage in recognizing the real as opposed to the convenient. For when it comes to love, in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

I know this much is true...

You must come to terms with yourself, acknowledge your core self and delight in who you are. Make strides to improve specific aspects of your life with fervor. Above all, love yourself first. Before you were a boyfriend/girlfriend, a spouse or whatever connotation you choose, you were you - a marvelous being. A partner should not bare the responsibility of completing you; a partner should compliment the wholesome you.

Like an iPhone in a Blender...

Yet another sleepless night. Too much noise in the head. Kinda sounds like...

Behavior.Attitude.Thinking.Habit.

WORK! WORK! WORK! WORK! WORK!

Did someone record one of my conversations two weeks ago at Calderone's New Year's Day Party? WORK! WORK! WORK! WORK! WORK!

The Awful Truth: My Dreams Are Gone With The Wind

One of my favorite screwball comedies of the 30's, the story of Jerry and Lucy Warrimer has inspired and been re-imagined in many a movie and soap operas. 
The plot of the movie is such... Suspicions and assumptions lead the Warrimer's to begin divorce preceedings, and soon after they begin to undermine each other's attempt to find new romances. 
At this particular juncture of the film, Lucy pretends to be Jerry's sister, Lola, after she picks up the phone at his apartment and he hastly explains to his love interest, Barbara, that his sister is in town visiting from abroad. 
During dinner with Barbara and her family, Lola/Lucy arrives unannounced of course, to support her brother and meet his new lady. What follows is Lucy's attempt to sour any possibility of Jerry making an good impression on Barbara and her parents.
It is quite the tennis match throughout the film. The lengths to which both Jerry and Lucy go to only lead them to realize how much they trully mean to one another. Below is an earlier scene in the film, from which Lucy draws her inspiration to portray Jerry's sister.


Sometimes I wish romance was as fun and carefree as it is in The Awful Truth.

Sunday Breakfast

I moved into my apartment last September 10th, and yet, I can not say that I have exactly been living in it since then. 

Today, I finally got around to making a real breakfast. 

It's not fully furnished and it could use a touch of color. Much like my life, my apartment is a work in progress. 

9:02am

Guilty for unintentionally inflicting hurt. Helpless over a situation that can not be easily resolved. Reflecting on a present that was once a past. Frightened by a present that could be a future. Hopeful that in time it will be understood.

And so it is...

A man's age is something impressive, it sums up his life: maturity reached slowly and against many obstacles, illnesses cured, griefs and despairs overcome, and unconscious risks taken; maturity formed through so many desires, hopes, regrets, forgotten things, loves. A man's age represents a fine cargo of experiences and memories. ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wartime Writings 1939-1944, translated from French by Norah Purcell

We don't have mistakes here, we just have happy accidents.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

I find myself once again at a crossroads. As a result of which, I am emotionally drained and lacking focus. Just light a candle in a effort to shed some light and clarity. Almost instantly I found myself thinking… "be cheerful... strive to be happy."

I remember the first time I heard those words. I was listening to a Brothomstates set, back in 2002 which started off with a man reciting a poem which resonated with me. I did a little research and I discovered… Desiderata.

Desiderata has been with me now for nine years. I spent months trying to commit the entire poem to mind. And then I found myself letting go of that desire. I decided to carry it with me, and reflecting on it when I felt a need. 

Over the last nine years, when I find myself facing uncertainty, I am drawn to Desiderata as a means of seeking solace and encouragement.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly to the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann c.1920

Always, always to the end of my days

El Camino

Once again I find myself in all to familiar territory. The only difference is, this time around, I do not feel as though I have failed, and I do not feel that I have lost. Sometimes one can gain alot by just simply... walking away.